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LadyChakotay's Quarters
If I were writing the script... Graphic Intensive

Note: This page is graphic intensive. It may take a few minutes to dowload all the pics. Please be patient.

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Chakotay, do you really expect me
to believe that the shuttle ran
out of gas?

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Nonsense, Captain! It's not
burned. Leola root always
smells like that?

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Just try to look casual, Kathryn.
Like we weren't doing anything wrong.

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...and then, Commander, I'm going to
rip that uniform off you and...

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Okay, tonight I'll be Xena,
Warrior Princess and you be...

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You first. No, you first.
No, really, I insist, you first...

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...and then the bajoran in the chicken
suit said....

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Just exactly how many
bottles of Romulan Ale
did you drink, Commander?

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I wonder if her underwear
are Starfleet issue...

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Seven's soft side: "Cease your
expulsion of tears, infant. Your
maternal figure is currently present."

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...so then I said, "If you
want a speciman of that from
me, you'll have to rub my..."

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Very funny, Mr. Paris! Now
beam down my uniform!

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Chakotay, do I read over
your shoulder while your
chatting on Yahoo?

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Really?! The Captain is now
dating holograms?!? Lucky me!

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Uh...Captain. The Trelarian
Bird-eating spider Tuvok had
at his station has gotten loose!

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Very well, Captain. Since it has
been so long for you, I will explain
it again. The man's body contains the
fertilizer and the woman's body contains
the eggs...

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Commander, stop looking at my
chest when I'm talking to you!

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...and I caught a Sarcadian
bull fish. It was this big!"

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Unfortunately for both of us,
Mr. Neelix, it is time for your
yearly proctology exam.

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What do you mean you saw Seven
swallow a whole frankfurter?!?

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Really, Tuvok! I thought that
part of your anatomy would've
been... bigger.

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Now Doctor, how about I
examine you this time, hmmmm?

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Chakotay, can you really touch
your nose with your tongue?

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Yes, Mr. Paris. After we play
naked Twister, I thought we
could....

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And for my next shadow puppet,
a rabbit!

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Is it my imagination,
or am I overdressed?

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Click the communicator above to return to the top of the page.

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Chakotay! I'm telling you for
the last time. Get out of
my underwear drawer!

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Well, hello Chakotay. I appreciate
your saluting me, but where are
your clothes?

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No, Kathryn. I don't think it
can be used to make coffee.

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ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

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A brief but horrifying glimpse
at Ensign Expendable's worst
nightmare.

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Janeway to Security!
Intruder Alert!

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You say you can tie a cherry
stem in a knot with your
tongue, Kathryn?

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It's okay B'Elanna. I won't
tell Tom if you don't tell
the Captain.

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Okay, Tuvok! This time I'll
count to ten and you go hide.

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ah...ah... ACHOOOO!!!

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What the hell is that smell?!?!

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Kathryn, this dress really
brings out your...eyes.

Those aren't my eyes, Chakotay.

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So, I won the Voyager's Hunk
of the Year award again, huh?

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...and so I said, "Tuvok, with ears like
that you should pick up Starfleet signals
from here."

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I knew when the replicator
produced that can of AquaNet
this was going to be a bad day!

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Um...Tom? When I asked you to
create a holodeck program where I
could go to cool off, this isn't what
I had in mind!

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Oh God! Who is this LadyChakotay,
and why is she writing all these
naughty stories about me?

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So, Tuvok. One mind meld with me
and you think my mind is this barren?

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Okay, whose idea was it to
make Tuvok the Easter Bunny?

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God! If I have to hear about
Leola root for one more minute
I'll self destruct!

Lt. Torres, if I hear of you trying
to jettison Seven into space again,
I'll put you in the brig. Understood?

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Judging by the look on
Janeway's face, I'm guessing
Chakotay's at the helm.

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Oh Kathy! Stop sulking! I'll
give Chuckles his tattoo back. But first, you must do something for me...

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And last, but certainly not least...
the three men who fuel far too
many of LadyChakotay's fantasies.
YUUUUMMMMMMY!

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Many thanks to you Stephen, for your assistance on this page and for your unfailing support.